Max Bottaro

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#10 Joe Pesci:

a la Goodfellas and Casino. He’s not big, he’s not strong; in fact he’s downright puny. But what he lacks in stature he makes up in downright crazys. Pesci definitely takes the cake in terms of complete disregard for human life. Don’t insult this guy in a bar, unless you want a pen jammed in your jugular. Savage as fuck.

#9 Tupac Shakur:

Grab your Glocks when you see 2pac,
Call the cops when you see 2pac,
You shot me,
But you punks didn’t finish
Now you’re ’bout to feel the wrath of a menace

With his AK he’s the thug you just love to hate. A lot of rappers talk a big game about being really “hood”, but until you’ve been in a couple shoot outs you can’t really even put yourself in the same category. Go back to rapping about your 22’s, you commercial, sellout, consumer whores.

#8 Chuck Liddell:

Look, I know he’s not winning right now. In fact, he’s been getting the crap kicked out of him lately. Still, Chuck has that inextinguishable distinct badass aura about him. I don’t know if it’s his buzz-hawk, his American History X looking goatee, or the fact that he could beat the crap out of 99.99% of guys out there, but this is one Coor’s Light drinkin’ hick I wouldn’t want to meet in a dark ally.

#7 Wolverine:

He is the real reason I started growing out my chest hair a couple weeks ago. Wolverine is by far the hardest of the X-men. Wolverine heals very quickly, but his only real “power” is some metal claws that extend out of his knuckles on command. He uses these for everything. Someone taking over the world? Shingggg. Someone need rescuing? Shinggg. Time to walk the dog? Shinggg.

#6 Leonidas of Sparta

Everyone who saw 300 knows what I am talking about. Anyone who walks around with a spear, one of those badass helmets, and pimp cape gets a badass stamp from me. I’ve officially decided that kicking someone in the chest is the most badass way you could turn down an offer. “Go to McDonalds? THIS IS BURGER KING!!!” Bam. Right in the xiphoid process.

What makes Leonidas a badass is his good old attitude of ‘fuck ya’. You want me to join the Persians? Fuck you. Your arrows will blot out the sun? Fuck you, we’ll fight in the shade. You want me to kiss your your feet? Fuck you, eat spear.

P.S. his wife was a total cougar in that movie. Sexy.

#5 Ronnie Coleman:

There’s a reason they call this guy “The Big Nasty”. No, he’s not in porn. He’s an 8 time Mr. Olympia, and unlike most bodybuilders, he actually is strong as shit. Like, freakishly strong. Like I just dead-lifted 800lbs twice strong. He’s like the incredible Hulk, but black instead of green. There might be guys out there stronger than Ronnie (although I doubt it) but no one has his classic meathead mannerisms.

“YEAAAAAAH Buddddy: LIGHT WEIGHT!! Ain’t nothing but a P-Nut!”

#4 Bruce Lee:

I think you all saw this one coming. He is the poster-boy for 20^th century martial arts; a real life ninja. He’s ripped to shreds, wiry as fuck, and incredibly powerful. I’ve never seen a more complete and clean transfer of force when this guy throws a punch or kick.

#3 “Marv”:

Sin City would have been just O.K. without Marv. When he wasn’t maiming people or smoking cigarettes, he was giving shadowy narrations in his gravelly man-voice. My favorite scene in this whole movie comes when Marv is going through his checklist of items necessary to kill someone: “Mitts? Check.” Marv is the Baddest pseudo good guy out there.

“This is blood for blood and by the gallon. These are the old days, the bad days, the all-or-nothing days. They’re back! There’s no choice left. And I’m ready for war.”

#2 Ray Lewis:

Ray Lewis: Nine time pro-bowler ,named All-Pro 7 times, not to mention Super-bowl m.v.p. (defensive players rarely get this award). Not much I need to say about this guy. He just hits people really hard. If you have any doubts, check out his highlights.

#1 Mike Tyson:

probably nuts, definitely the most explosive, hardest hitting, most controversial fighter ever. Just watching Tyson’s knockout reels gets me pumped. He’s compact, powerful, and he throws whiplash causing, sweat spraying, mouth-guard flinging knockout punches from every angle. Heavyweight Boxing just wasn’t what it was during the Tyson era. Don’t believe me? Check the box offices.

Outside the ring, Tyson was a troubled individual. He was new money; a storm of controversy, a ghetto child who still desperately needed the mentorship of Cus D’Amato. He was a more complex individual than most people gave him credit for. He was the first and youngest to unify the heavyweight belt at 20 years old. He was an X-convict. He was rags to riches and back to rags again. He was an ear biting, facial tattooing, real life Rambo in black trunks. You either love him or hate him, but you had to admit he was exciting to watch.

Classic Tyson TV moments

Training

Knockouts

“I try to catch them right on the tip of his nose, because I try to punch the bone into the brain.”

-Michael Gerard Tyson

#??? Chuck Norris:

#??? Chuck Norris: Ahh… Chuck. What do I do with you. While your name is synonymous with badassery, I personally think you are a tool belt and therefore underserving of a top ten ranking. Still, to not list you would be irresponsible.

I have to be honest, I never really got the whole Chuck Norris comeback. Was the joke that he was so fucking lame it was funny, and therefore hip? Can someone fill me in here? Chuck Norris was the lamest; most over-the-top action star of the 80’s… the lamest period in film history. He’s not really even that buff, and he has way too much body hair to be cool. Still, Chuck’s name evokes images of badass due to the whole mindset surrounding him. There is no real chuck, just an illusory vision: one of pure badassery. Here are some sayings people came up with about chuck that I think illustrates his aura well:

If you make a list of 10 things Chuck Norris cannot do, he will appear at your house and perform them all. Your life may be forfeit.

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

Chuck Norris doesn’t do push-ups, he bench presses the earth.

Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.

The votes are in, and yes- ladies and gentleman, we have our first ever black president. So what does Barack Obama’s victory mean for America? Are we entering a new age of equality? Has a person’s race really become less important than their beliefs?

First of all, I was happy that Obama won. I think he is the better candidate for a number of reasons (none of which have to do with his skin). Having said that, I was somewhat disappointed with the racial repercussions this election had. I don’t think someone’s race should have any place in politics, and quite frankly I think it did.

CNN reports that 96% of black people voted ended up voting for Obama. O.K., let’s assume that Obama is the better candidate (because I think he is) and that he should have received the majority of votes (which I think he did), be they from whites, blacks, whatever. Still, 96 frickin’ percent? Really? What if 96% of white people voted for McCain? Would that be considered racist? There’s no way you can tell me that a good portion of black voters voted for Obama just because he was black. I’m sorry, but a persons skin color isn’t a good reason to vote one way or the other. It was pretty transparent that skin color played a huge role in the election- which I think shows that racism is still prevalent. Stereotyping is unavoidable and natural- if you show me someone who doesn’t have stereotypes I’ll show you a liar. Still, when it gets to the point where we let something like race influence our actions (who we vote for) I think that counts as racism.  Luckily racism worked out this time, but I still think its bull.

Another thing, Obama is every bit as white as he is black (did you see his grandma?) but people still call him black. You would be equally right to call him white. I’m so sick of dichotomies.

Anyways, not to be a debbie downer- I am glad he won and I’m excited to see what happens from here. America, F*CK YEAH!

How Complaining and Blaming will end up Ruining you

First and foremost, no one likes a whiner. Have you ever had that friend who just complained about everything? How his knee hurt, he was sick, or his job sucks? They probably got old quick.

Secondly, people have their own problems to worry about. They really don’t care that your boss is a douche. If you’ve ever come home from a long day and had someone start complaining to you about their life, you know what I am talking about. It’s just annoying. You might humor them a little: “Oh really? That sucks… I feel you man” but deep down you just wanted to change the subject. I think what it really boils down to is being egotistical- are you really so important that people should care about your minuscule problems?

3^rd- Complaining doesn’t solve anything. You might get some sympathy, but do you really want to be someone people pity? When I was younger my grandfather was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He had every right to complain, but when we visited him for the last time he never mentioned it. My last childhood memories of him were fond; he seemed like a strong, concerted man. We flew kites went to the movies, despite the fact that he was probably thinking about death. I’m not saying you have to be a robot, but it’s really impressive and respectable when people carry weight like that by themselves. It’s inspiring. You can be inspiring or pitiable. The choice is yours.

4^th- I can’t explain this, but when you complain about stuff it seems to draw more negativity into your life. By focusing on the negative, you become a bit of a shit magnet… it’s almost like the universe says “hmm… here is an individual who likes to obsess and talk about the negativity in their life. Well, let’s give him what he wants…” Plop. The universe drops another deuce on you. It’s like this with any habit- if you look at a heavy drug user, all their friends are stoners and junkies, their walls and coffee tables are covered in drug paraphernalia , they smell and talk like drug users. Whiners draw negativity into their lives the same way- by focusing on it obsessively.

5^th- blaming takes your power away. My professor is an asshole, that’s why I got a bad grade. My boss just doesn’t like me, that’s why I am not getting promoted. When you attribute your loss to something outside your control, you are basically telling yourself “there was nothing I could or can do, I am powerless to these external forces.” You are not. You are not lifeless tumbleweed subject to the foul winds of fate. Start asking your brain HOW instead of why? How can I get a better grade. How can I make some money. I hear a lot of people say “life isn’t fair!” like that’s a bad thing. Thank God life isn’t fair! If it was we would all be forced to live the same way, there would be no opportunity to move up.

So here’s what I suggest- stop complaining for 10 days. Just ten days and see if your life doesn’t improve dramatically. I stopped complaining about 2 months ago, and I have had drastically less to complain about. Next time you catch yourself complaining, yell “Stop It!”.

Recall a beautiful scene in your life, maybe it was a sunset or a beach- a scene so beautiful and awe inspiring that for a few short minutes you were transported to a place of utter serenity. What happened? What happened was, in that short instance, you accepted whatever was presented to you without reservation. You were not looking to make changes. You didn’t say ‘that tree is beautiful, but some of the branches are crooked… if I had a chainsaw I could lop off a few branches and make it perfect. That rainbow is beautiful, but a little to the left…. If I could just move it a few hundred yards to the right, then the scene would be better.’ This isn’t what you thought. The tree was crooked, and it was perfect. The rainbow was asymmetrical, and it was perfect. You were ok with things the way they were- and for a few minutes you were utterly happy.

-Dr. Srikumar Rao

Why be happy and content with life? First of all, it’s subjectively more pleasant. Being happy is better for your health too- various studies link stress and discontent with heart disease and cancer. It is also in this mind state that you will be most productive and creative in doing whatever it is you do.

Some people have an issue with just being happy- “how can I be happy if I haven’t yet accomplished what I set out to accomplish?” This common mindset is based on a universal, but inherently broken model: I need to get something, so that I can do something, so that I can be something: I need to get money, so I can have fancy things, so I can impress people and be happy. I need to get a promotion, so I can have more respect, so I can be happy. Virtually everything we do in life is in the pursuit of happiness. Justify any action you took today. It was probably so you could get something, so you could do something, so you could be something (happy). We think in the Future- “if X”, “then happiness”- but we exist in the present.

This model is in the pursuit of happiness, and it is a fundamentally flawed model. You will always be in the pursuit of happiness and you will never arrive. If you believe happiness comes from getting something, doing something, or being something, then you will never accept happiness. You already have the ability to be happy; you were born with it. Happiness is innate. It is in your DNA.

We believe we can’t be happy because we buy into the “get something, do something, be something” happiness model with every ounce of our being, not realizing that real happiness and serenity is right in front of us. Here is an example from Dr. Srikumar Rao: “recall a beautiful scene in your life, maybe it was a sunset or a beach- a scene so beautiful and awe inspiring that for a few short minutes you were transported to a place of utter serenity. What happened? What happened was, in that short instance, you accepted whatever was presented to you without reservation. You were not looking to make changes. You didn’t say ‘that tree is beautiful, but some of the branches are crooked… if I had a chainsaw I could lop off a few branches and make it perfect. That rainbow is beautiful, but a little to the left…. If I could just move it a few hundred yards to the right, then the scene would be better.’ This isn’t what you thought. The tree was crooked, and it was perfect. The rainbow was asymmetrical, and it was perfect. You were ok with things the way they were.” When you accept your current conditions unreservedly, when you acknowledge life without disdain, that is where happiness occurs.

Your life, the one that you are so sure is full of problems and frustration, is perfect the way it is. The only thing stopping you from serenity and happiness is that you are discontent with things. You desperately crave change.

By “accepting life unreservedly” I am not suggesting you become complacent and stop trying. Certainly change and growth is healthy and necessary; but you want to make life changes from a place of wholeness and serenity, not because life is so awful you simply can’t stand it anymore. In this way life becomes a series of fulfilling travels and experiences, not a struggle to get out of a current situation, and “into a better one”. Perfection is impossible, it can never be achieved. Yet perfection is already presented to us—the beautiful sunset with the crooked tree and the asymmetrical rainbow.

Most college aged students have had to deal with interviews at some point during their life. After college, they most certainly will. Whether you seek to be an employee, go to grad school, or take the entrepreneurial path, there will be interviews: with the typical corporate employers, university recruiters, and even potential business partners.

Most people have a negative - or at least non-supportive- schema of interviews: they think “the purpose of the interview is to make the interviewer like me enough so that maybe I can get the job offer”. Sound familiar? Until recently this was pretty close my internal monologue going into an interview. Not only is “trying to get someone to like you” (i.e. trying to impress them) extremely stressful, it is also counter-productive! The purpose of the interview is not to get the interview to like you, it is to explore the possibility of you being a good fit with the company.

When you go into an interview with the notion that “I must to impress the interviewer” you will come across as either desperate or insincere. Neither of these are attractive traits to an employer. Employers look for two things: 1) can this person bring value to the company/university/team 2) Do they fit in with the culture here.
If you try and say whatever you think the employer wants to hear, you are going to lie, bend the truth, or say things that you don’t really believe. It’s strange, but when we say things we don’t really believe, a little conscious bug in our brains starts yelling at us “You liar!” — this little voice is so distracting that we start to sound weak and unconvincing. Our tonality and prosody changes; we use vague terminology. On the other hand, if we believe what we are saying, we can say it with confidence; and confidence sells. The best salespeople in the world believe in their product. In an interview, you are the product: believe in yourself and what you are saying.

Aside from sounding confident, the other benefit of being honest in an interview is you won’t sound like you are trying to impress the recruiter. When you try to impress someone, be it a group of friends or a hot date, it comes across very clearly. Either consciously or subconsciously the other person will pick up on this needy behavior and slot you lower in the social hierarchy chain (remember: if you have to suck up, it’s because you are below). It is very possible to get a job by sucking up, but chances are this will be a job with little responsibility. Moving up the ladder later on will be difficult: once you slot yourself lower than someone else in that initial first impression, it’s hard to change that person’s view of you.

Here is a more productive approach to an interview: ask not what you can do for the company, ask what the company can do for you. If you are going to be spending a large portion of your life at an institution, make sure it’s right for you; don’t be so focused on if you are right for them. I give you permission to be selfish. This mentality will help you alleviate anxiety as well. “Today I am interviewing Wells Fargo”. This kind of approach will set you in a confident, serene, and empowering mood. You are now ready to meet your company. Just remember, if you don’t fit in with the company’s culture, and you aren’t qualified for the job, would you really want to be there?

If you were going to feel out a company, asking questions is the way to go. It shows you’ve done your research, you are engaging, and you actually care about where you work (you don’t just want any old job). Here are some good questions, and the reasoning behind them

- How did you get to where you are?
This builds rapport, opens new topics to discuss, shows you are interested in moving up in the company, and people really do love talking about themselves…

- Can you give me an example of a time you felt totally alive and passionate about your organization?
Shows you want to feel excited about your work, and you want to know if this place can offer that. Now the momentum has shifted. This is a hard question. Shut up. The pressure is on them.

- Can you give me a time when you felt a bit embarrassed or ashamed to be a part of this organization?
This shows you have moral values. And Chutzpah. This is a ballsy question to ask an interviewer—make sure you do it right: look them straight in the eye and speak with confidence. Then shut up. Don’t be afraid of awkward silences; they are emotionally powerful.

I would research a company before hand too, www.fdcareer.com has a great job database. You can talk to people who have actually had the job you want and see if it is right for you.