The votes are in, and yes- ladies and gentleman, we have our first ever black president. So what does Barack Obama’s victory mean for America? Are we entering a new age of equality? Has a person’s race really become less important than their beliefs?

First of all, I was happy that Obama won. I think he is the better candidate for a number of reasons (none of which have to do with his skin). Having said that, I was somewhat disappointed with the racial repercussions this election had. I don’t think someone’s race should have any place in politics, and quite frankly I think it did.

CNN reports that 96% of black people voted ended up voting for Obama. O.K., let’s assume that Obama is the better candidate (because I think he is) and that he should have received the majority of votes (which I think he did), be they from whites, blacks, whatever. Still, 96 frickin’ percent? Really? What if 96% of white people voted for McCain? Would that be considered racist? There’s no way you can tell me that a good portion of black voters voted for Obama just because he was black. I’m sorry, but a persons skin color isn’t a good reason to vote one way or the other. It was pretty transparent that skin color played a huge role in the election- which I think shows that racism is still prevalent. Stereotyping is unavoidable and natural- if you show me someone who doesn’t have stereotypes I’ll show you a liar. Still, when it gets to the point where we let something like race influence our actions (who we vote for) I think that counts as racism.  Luckily racism worked out this time, but I still think its bull.

Another thing, Obama is every bit as white as he is black (did you see his grandma?) but people still call him black. You would be equally right to call him white. I’m so sick of dichotomies.

Anyways, not to be a debbie downer- I am glad he won and I’m excited to see what happens from here. America, F*CK YEAH!

First and foremost, no one likes a whiner. Have you ever had that friend who just complained about everything? How his knee hurt, he was sick, or his job sucks? They probably got old quick.

Secondly, people have their own problems to worry about. They really don’t care that your boss is a douche. If you’ve ever come home from a long day and had someone start complaining to you about their life, you know what I am talking about. It’s just annoying. You might humor them a little: “Oh really? That sucks… I feel you man” but deep down you just wanted to change the subject. I think what it really boils down to is being egotistical- are you really so important that people should care about your minuscule problems?

3^rd- Complaining doesn’t solve anything. You might get some sympathy, but do you really want to be someone people pity? When I was younger my grandfather was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He had every right to complain, but when we visited him for the last time he never mentioned it. My last childhood memories of him were fond; he seemed like a strong, concerted man. We flew kites went to the movies, despite the fact that he was probably thinking about death. I’m not saying you have to be a robot, but it’s really impressive and respectable when people carry weight like that by themselves. It’s inspiring. You can be inspiring or pitiable. The choice is yours.

4^th- I can’t explain this, but when you complain about stuff it seems to draw more negativity into your life. By focusing on the negative, you become a bit of a shit magnet… it’s almost like the universe says “hmm… here is an individual who likes to obsess and talk about the negativity in their life. Well, let’s give him what he wants…” Plop. The universe drops another deuce on you. It’s like this with any habit- if you look at a heavy drug user, all their friends are stoners and junkies, their walls and coffee tables are covered in drug paraphernalia , they smell and talk like drug users. Whiners draw negativity into their lives the same way- by focusing on it obsessively.

5^th- blaming takes your power away. My professor is an asshole, that’s why I got a bad grade. My boss just doesn’t like me, that’s why I am not getting promoted. When you attribute your loss to something outside your control, you are basically telling yourself “there was nothing I could or can do, I am powerless to these external forces.” You are not. You are not lifeless tumbleweed subject to the foul winds of fate. Start asking your brain HOW instead of why? How can I get a better grade. How can I make some money. I hear a lot of people say “life isn’t fair!” like that’s a bad thing. Thank God life isn’t fair! If it was we would all be forced to live the same way, there would be no opportunity to move up.

So here’s what I suggest- stop complaining for 10 days. Just ten days and see if your life doesn’t improve dramatically. I stopped complaining about 2 months ago, and I have had drastically less to complain about. Next time you catch yourself complaining, yell “Stop It!”.

Recall a beautiful scene in your life, maybe it was a sunset or a beach- a scene so beautiful and awe inspiring that for a few short minutes you were transported to a place of utter serenity. What happened? What happened was, in that short instance, you accepted whatever was presented to you without reservation. You were not looking to make changes. You didn’t say ‘that tree is beautiful, but some of the branches are crooked… if I had a chainsaw I could lop off a few branches and make it perfect. That rainbow is beautiful, but a little to the left…. If I could just move it a few hundred yards to the right, then the scene would be better.’ This isn’t what you thought. The tree was crooked, and it was perfect. The rainbow was asymmetrical, and it was perfect. You were ok with things the way they were- and for a few minutes you were utterly happy.

-Dr. Srikumar Rao

Why be happy and content with life? First of all, it’s subjectively more pleasant. Being happy is better for your health too- various studies link stress and discontent with heart disease and cancer. It is also in this mind state that you will be most productive and creative in doing whatever it is you do.

Some people have an issue with just being happy- “how can I be happy if I haven’t yet accomplished what I set out to accomplish?” This common mindset is based on a universal, but inherently broken model: I need to get something, so that I can do something, so that I can be something: I need to get money, so I can have fancy things, so I can impress people and be happy. I need to get a promotion, so I can have more respect, so I can be happy. Virtually everything we do in life is in the pursuit of happiness. Justify any action you took today. It was probably so you could get something, so you could do something, so you could be something (happy). We think in the Future- “if X”, “then happiness”- but we exist in the present.

This model is in the pursuit of happiness, and it is a fundamentally flawed model. You will always be in the pursuit of happiness and you will never arrive. If you believe happiness comes from getting something, doing something, or being something, then you will never accept happiness. You already have the ability to be happy; you were born with it. Happiness is innate. It is in your DNA.

We believe we can’t be happy because we buy into the “get something, do something, be something” happiness model with every ounce of our being, not realizing that real happiness and serenity is right in front of us. Here is an example from Dr. Srikumar Rao: “recall a beautiful scene in your life, maybe it was a sunset or a beach- a scene so beautiful and awe inspiring that for a few short minutes you were transported to a place of utter serenity. What happened? What happened was, in that short instance, you accepted whatever was presented to you without reservation. You were not looking to make changes. You didn’t say ‘that tree is beautiful, but some of the branches are crooked… if I had a chainsaw I could lop off a few branches and make it perfect. That rainbow is beautiful, but a little to the left…. If I could just move it a few hundred yards to the right, then the scene would be better.’ This isn’t what you thought. The tree was crooked, and it was perfect. The rainbow was asymmetrical, and it was perfect. You were ok with things the way they were.” When you accept your current conditions unreservedly, when you acknowledge life without disdain, that is where happiness occurs.

Your life, the one that you are so sure is full of problems and frustration, is perfect the way it is. The only thing stopping you from serenity and happiness is that you are discontent with things. You desperately crave change.

By “accepting life unreservedly” I am not suggesting you become complacent and stop trying. Certainly change and growth is healthy and necessary; but you want to make life changes from a place of wholeness and serenity, not because life is so awful you simply can’t stand it anymore. In this way life becomes a series of fulfilling travels and experiences, not a struggle to get out of a current situation, and “into a better one”. Perfection is impossible, it can never be achieved. Yet perfection is already presented to us—the beautiful sunset with the crooked tree and the asymmetrical rainbow.

Most college aged students have had to deal with interviews at some point during their life. After college, they most certainly will. Whether you seek to be an employee, go to grad school, or take the entrepreneurial path, there will be interviews: with the typical corporate employers, university recruiters, and even potential business partners.

Most people have a negative - or at least non-supportive- schema of interviews: they think “the purpose of the interview is to make the interviewer like me enough so that maybe I can get the job offer”. Sound familiar? Until recently this was pretty close my internal monologue going into an interview. Not only is “trying to get someone to like you” (i.e. trying to impress them) extremely stressful, it is also counter-productive! The purpose of the interview is not to get the interview to like you, it is to explore the possibility of you being a good fit with the company.

When you go into an interview with the notion that “I must to impress the interviewer” you will come across as either desperate or insincere. Neither of these are attractive traits to an employer. Employers look for two things: 1) can this person bring value to the company/university/team 2) Do they fit in with the culture here.
If you try and say whatever you think the employer wants to hear, you are going to lie, bend the truth, or say things that you don’t really believe. It’s strange, but when we say things we don’t really believe, a little conscious bug in our brains starts yelling at us “You liar!” — this little voice is so distracting that we start to sound weak and unconvincing. Our tonality and prosody changes; we use vague terminology. On the other hand, if we believe what we are saying, we can say it with confidence; and confidence sells. The best salespeople in the world believe in their product. In an interview, you are the product: believe in yourself and what you are saying.

Aside from sounding confident, the other benefit of being honest in an interview is you won’t sound like you are trying to impress the recruiter. When you try to impress someone, be it a group of friends or a hot date, it comes across very clearly. Either consciously or subconsciously the other person will pick up on this needy behavior and slot you lower in the social hierarchy chain (remember: if you have to suck up, it’s because you are below). It is very possible to get a job by sucking up, but chances are this will be a job with little responsibility. Moving up the ladder later on will be difficult: once you slot yourself lower than someone else in that initial first impression, it’s hard to change that person’s view of you.

Here is a more productive approach to an interview: ask not what you can do for the company, ask what the company can do for you. If you are going to be spending a large portion of your life at an institution, make sure it’s right for you; don’t be so focused on if you are right for them. I give you permission to be selfish. This mentality will help you alleviate anxiety as well. “Today I am interviewing Wells Fargo”. This kind of approach will set you in a confident, serene, and empowering mood. You are now ready to meet your company. Just remember, if you don’t fit in with the company’s culture, and you aren’t qualified for the job, would you really want to be there?

If you were going to feel out a company, asking questions is the way to go. It shows you’ve done your research, you are engaging, and you actually care about where you work (you don’t just want any old job). Here are some good questions, and the reasoning behind them

- How did you get to where you are?
This builds rapport, opens new topics to discuss, shows you are interested in moving up in the company, and people really do love talking about themselves…

- Can you give me an example of a time you felt totally alive and passionate about your organization?
Shows you want to feel excited about your work, and you want to know if this place can offer that. Now the momentum has shifted. This is a hard question. Shut up. The pressure is on them.

- Can you give me a time when you felt a bit embarrassed or ashamed to be a part of this organization?
This shows you have moral values. And Chutzpah. This is a ballsy question to ask an interviewer—make sure you do it right: look them straight in the eye and speak with confidence. Then shut up. Don’t be afraid of awkward silences; they are emotionally powerful.

I would research a company before hand too, www.fdcareer.com has a great job database. You can talk to people who have actually had the job you want and see if it is right for you.

The fact is, everyone is in sales. Whatever area you work in, you do have clients and you do need to sell.
-Jay Abraham

Selling-in the purest sense-is the art of causing people to willingly part with their cash. A good salesperson will make this process as painless as possible. The best compliment you can get as a salesperson is “You weren’t a good salesperson; I just really wanted the product”.

In my limited experience in sales, there are 2 major reasons people decide to buy products. The first is the costumer really “needs” the product. I say “needs” because this is a perceptual shift that often must to take place before a costumer is sold. A lot of people want certain products, but they will only be bothered to pay if they feel like they need it. As a salesman, it is your job to show the costumer why they need the product. The second reason people buy is they like you, the salesperson. In direct sales, a decision to buy is often a combination of these two factors: the prospect likes you, and they like the product.

I don’t care if you sell fast cars or candy bars, certain sales principles will be applicable across different scenarios. The art of selling is practical in almost any walk of life; you sell yourself in a job interview, you sell your opinions when you argue, and you sell your value when you pursue relationships. The roots of any business are based on sales. I don’t care if you have the best product in the world, if you can’t sell it effectively you don’t have a business. Conversely, if you knew how to market and sell a product well, why you could probably bottle water turn it into a million dollar industry.

Here are some gems of wisdom I’ve picked up along the way- mostly from more experienced and profitable salespeople. I suggest looking for the underlying thought process, attitude, and belief system vs. actual words. Pick up lines won’t get you girls, and canned sales pitches don’t make sales. But if your belief system and attitude is right, it doesn’t really matter what you say. It’s how you say it that communicates with power.

When direct selling to a costumer, you will inevitably come across objections. It could be price, timing, or some other extraneous factor. As you sell your product, you will get a sense of the common objections people will come up with to not buy. Obviously, having a concise and logical response to every possible objection is necessary. Learn your common objections and have responses ready to shoot from the hip.

After a few objections and fast responses, prospects will catch on and say something to the extent of “it just doesn’t matter what we say, he’s got an answer for everything!” At this point you can make a choice: close the sale, or message your ego. You could say “well, I was the top salesperson in my office last month…” or, to paraphrase Zig Zigler, look them straight in the eye and say:

“Mr. Prospect, I appreciate that comment and I am going to take it as a compliment- but the truth is I don’t have answers to many of the objections and questions costumers have. That is why I am so excited to bring this product to you- because it is the answer to your problems; and in the end isn’t that what we all want?” while nodding your head.

Remember, you are there to solve the costumer’s problem, not slam witty rebuttals down their throat. You can be better than your prospect, or you can close the damn deal.

Just as a boxer uses a less harmful jab to create openings for more powerful punches, as a salesman can use a harmless question to open the mind of the prospect. The first thing I often do when I get into someone’s house to show them the vacuum is make a “jab”. As soon as I pull the first dirt pad out of their carpet, I’ll look them in the eye, smile, and say “cash or credit?” At this point, I’ve barely started the demo and hardly given them a reason to buy- the question to buy isn’t serious, it couldn’t be- it’s a nonthreatening joke. Still, it “punches” a whole in the prospect’s buying defense, and it puts them in the mindset of “purchase”. Jabs should be nonthreatening and friendly. They aren’t meant to close deals, they should be used early on. When the real ask comes down the road, it will seem like less of a shock.

%80 percent of purchases happen after the 6^th time a salesperson asks the prospect to buy. A jab can count as one of these asks. Just don’t be afraid to ask down the road. Shy salespeople have thin children.

Some people fold after making one timid request. They quit too soon. Keep asking until you find the answers. In sales there are usually four or five “no’s” before you get a “yes.”
-Jack Canfield

You want to avoid a situation where a costumer can give you a concise and clear “NO”. This not only puts them in a “no, not, never, can’t, won’t” mindset, it shuts down their “how” mindset. It’s weird, but when a costumer hears themselves say “no” they end up believing themselves. They can give you other bullshit objections for reasons not to buy; that is perfectly natural and even a good sign. But if you hear “no”, you can be rest assured that the part of their brain that comes up with “how” answers is shut down.

The easiest way to avoid this is not put yourself in a position to hear a “no”. Don’t ask “you want to buy, its $2195?” ask “if you were to buy, would you pay cash or credit?” I hate to use sex as an analogy to closing sales, but there are some similarities. You would never ask a girl “hey, you want to have sex? Let’s go.” You ease your way into it, so everything seems like a natural progression, and you avoid high pressure situations. Nothing will turn a prospect or a girl off more than being pushy, aggressive and direct. That doesn’t mean you should be shy, but there is a certain way of being bold that works.

“Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness, and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.” –Og Mandino

This idea ties in with the notion that half the reason people buy is because they like the salesmen. One of the best ways to get someone to like you is to be like them. I don’t mean be fake, but within your personality find things that you can genuinely appreciate about them, or that you have in common. For example, if someone has a Patriots poster in their house, I might talk football with them (although I wouldn’t pretend to be a Patriot’s fan).

Tweak your mannerisms and tonality to match your prospect’s. If I am with an older lady, I speak slowly, gesture softly, and I smile a lot. If I am with a younger guy, I am fast and energetic. If I am with uneducated people, I kind of dumb my language down. People trust people who are like them, and trust is a key component of sales.

You always want to be as sincere and as honest possible when you’re with a prospect- trust can make or break a deal. Honesty is also very hard to fake; people can almost always sense when the truth is being bent-and truth bending and issue minimization will turn prospects ice cold. If you don’t know something about your product, or your prospect has an objection you don’t have an answer to, it’s best just to look them in the eye and say:

“Honestly, I don’t know, but let me make a call and I’ll get back you.”

This let’s your prospect know you care about them, and it takes them off guard, because 99% of salesmen will try to weasel their way out of the question or minimize the issue (politician style). Don’t do this- not only is it unscrupulous- but your prospects won’t react positively to it. Fight the urge to make your product look like the flawless solution, and acknowledge possible issues directly and honestly.